I'm thinking Hillary is throwing ashtrays right now....

....and Obama is on the floor in the fetal position, thumb in mouth.

As less-than-enthused that I was about a possible McCain presidency, I think the choice of Sarah Palin as the VP is a masterstroke. Everything I know about this woman is stellar. She's more of a man than Obambi is :-). She's got the most "real" family of anyone that has run for the presidency in my lifetime...




From a few of my preferred commentary sites, I've culled a few awesome "Palinisms" that are sure to catch on...

--Sarah Palin is so tough, she wears polar bear fur when it’s 40 below outside… while the polar bear is still alive.

--Sarah Palin is so tough…she digs for oil with her bare hands and doesn’t ruin her manicure!

--I once saw Sarah Palin punch a hole through a cow just to see what was on the other side.

--Sarah Palin is so tough she glared at Obama and made him start his period.

--Palin is so tough, her Moose kills show blunt force trauma…

--Sarah Palin doesn’t use bait when she is fishing. She merely touches the hook with a bit of her perfume and the fish jump into the boat.

--Sarah Palin is so tough the 1975 Philadephia Flyers won’t play against her.

--Sarah Palin is so tough that John Wayne briefly returned from his grave today to endorse her.

--Sarah Palin doesn’t debate opponents, she debases opponents.

--Sarah Palin is so tough that she makes Barack Obama sit down when he urinates.

--Sarah Palin is so tough she shaves her legs with a blowtorch while putting on her lipstick.

--Sarah Palin is so tough that Osama bin Laden will now star in one of those Southwest Airlines “wanna get away” commercials.

--Sarah Palin is so tough that Chuck Norris wets his pants when she walks into the room.

--Sarah Palin didn’t take off work when she had her baby last Spring. She delivered the baby during a phone conference and finished the day.

--Sarah Palin is so tough that she can single-handedly tame 18 million pumas.


--Sarah Palin is so tough, when the glass ceiling heard of her nomination it didn’t shatter, it just fled in terror.

--Sarah Palin is so tough she sharpens her hunting knives by giving herself a manicure.


My new favorite campaign commercial....

OK OK. He wasn't my first choice. He's not Romney (central casting). Or Fred Thompson (sleepy). Or Guiliani (crimefighter). But he's a heckuva lot more appealing than Huckabee (squirrel-eating mormon-hater). And definitely more qualified than Obama (57 states, uhh, uhhh, uhhhhhmmm).

So here are my two new favorite campaign commercials...

When Nerds Collude...

...And Particles Collide...


I think when this finally goes down, the space/time continuum will implode and we'll all be sucked into a swirling vortex of hellfire via a newly created black hole. Awesome. I knew I should have paid more attention in my science class.

Because its cool, that's why....

Couple of the best voices in the industry on one of the best songs ever....

Springsteen & U2

First day of school

Its official. The kids are back in school. They all just got home and inundated Agi and I with info on the Big First Day. Over the past couple of weeks we'd occasionally gone over to both Nebo Elementary and Juab Junior High to have the kids walk around and get familiar with their classrooms, lockers, etc, and of course both places had orientation nights for parents last week where we could meet the teachers. We're comfortable with everyone we talked to.

I'm going to have problems with Aidan. I asked him the best thing about his day, and of course it was the fact that "there's a hot chick in the locker right next to mine". Super. This is the kid who apparently was juggling three 'girlfriends' in the fifth grade in Hungary. I am still hoping good 'ole US girls will be less enamored of the Palmer Family 'ladies man". An inauspicious debut.

Anyway--in light of the occasion, here's my favorite back to school video:

The Horrifying 80's...

I couldn't help it. Reading all my bro's and sisters' responses to that survey made me a little nostalgic for that awesomest of awesome decades--the 80's. I distinctly remember watching some music videos one afternoon in Payson on Utah Avenue with Janene (prolly Duran Duran or A-Ha) and one of us making the comment that the "our 80's" was so much cooler than the seventies, what with its bell-bottoms and bad hair, etc...

Well, I thought I'd try and find the one video that would put the lie to that statement. There were of course many, many contestants. But I think I have a winner.

And here it is...



Look away. I dare you. Look away....

Happenings, Schmappenings....

I've been accused by more than one source of slacking on the blog front since getting news of my impending hire by Intelliserv. Were that it so! Actually I've been pretty busy the last seven days. Monday was spent in two separate doctor's offices doing a battery of tests physical, drug, and otherwise (cough cough) for my employment packet. I also spent half a day in the Intelliserv offices filling out hire paperwork. Never been so happy to put pen to paper.

I've also been spending more time at the Ascent Group home in Mona than my actual home--worked a couple of double shifts (4 PM -8AM) a couple of times. Its nice getting paid to play basketball & Guitar Hero III with recovering drug/alcohol guys. Seriously. I've loved this job this summer, and it is really cool to work for a place that has redeeming social value. Structurally, I am actually taking some good notes on procedures that I'll be implementing in my own house once school starts.

Past few days I've also enjoyed reading all the responses to a family group questionaire that has wound its way through the Palmer/Kieffer/Wawro ranks. Funny stuff! Thanks all!

Speaking of The Funny, I am really rooting for this movie to do well in October--we need a good conservative spoof flick mocking all the idiot "conventional wisdom" that the Left and Michael Moore spout. With Russia pretending it is 1956 and 1968 all over again this past week, refuting the Left is now more relevant than ever. So check this out--I am going to be all over this movie...

My New Office...

Ohhhhh yyyeeaaahhh...

I'm stoked about my new profession! I am really looking forward to helping Intelliserv facilitate the removal of oil from our globe's nasty ocean seabeds and placement into the international commodity market. I start on September 2 w/classroom training in Provo followed by on-site rig practice off the coast of CA. Somewhere mixed in there will be what I am REALLY looking forward to-- a week of training in Scotland preparing me to escape from a downed, burning helicopter in the middle of the ocean! And I thought my mock-interrogation training in Germany was fun!

I am a kid in a candy store right now. Its going to be a blast. I get to do everything I want: Work for a RAPIDLY growing company with a superhot proprietary product in a sizzling industry--check. Get out from behind a desk--check. Fly in a helicopter on a regular basis--check. See the world--check. Get copious amounts of time off to spend with my kids--check.

I'll be monitoring and maintaining Intelliserv's proprietary new networked drillpipe system that, in the course of drilling for new oil deposits, can communicate massive amounts of real-time data between the drill-head and surface-- ensuring that whatever company utilizing our services will be able locate and tap oil deposits in the most efficient and cost-effective manner. So suck on that, Al Gore :-) Oil rules.

In all seriousness, I am thrilled with this opportunity. I've been circling this position like a vulture since May, when we returned from Hungary, and it finally happened. After three interviews over the last month, I got the offer this morning :-)

Best of all, I have Agi's blessing to now shave my head and get a gnarly oil tattoo. But, being that this job is actually a little more sophisticated than that, I should probably hold off :-) A guy can dream, though...

Happy BIrthday Mom!

A quick shout out to Mom Palmer in Waterloo Iowa! Happy birthday from the Nephi Palmer's...

We hope your day was wonderful, and that the next 29 years will be as pleasant as the first 29 ;-)

Love ya.

AaronAgiAndrewAidanAliAshton



I'm told this is what BIrthday Cakes look like in both Nephi & Waterloo....